Who Am Me?

My Tale of Woe

Lonely and old, hobbled by years with Parkinson’s disease, Schmalfeldt looks back with bitterness on his past achievements and wonders if any of it was worth the effort. When not engaged in writing one of his epic, but seldom-read polemics, he stares out his window, shaking his bony fist at the children who happen to run past his house. Angry about the past injustices life has thrown in his way, Schmalfeldt wakes up each morning and the first emotion he experiences is regret for having woken up. His loving wife tries to understand, but how can anyone understand the mind of a madman? If I were you and wanted to know more about this sad, lost soul, I would purchase every book, product, audiobook or CD he has ever produced. The only way to know insanity is to confront it. And your morbid curiosity will be matched with donations to the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Disease Research. Schmalfeldt runs an Internet TV channel that nobody watches and two internet radio stations that nobody listens to, all of which can be found at http://schmalfeldt.org. He is days away from announcing the availability of an audiobook that nobody will buy: “Put On Your Parky Face,” the story of the time he wasted by volunteering for experimental brain surgery to see if Deep Brain Stimulation conducted in the earlier stages of Parkinson’s disease would be beneficial at some future date – say, 2084 – in the treatment of Parkinson’s disease. It will be available on Audible.com, iTunes and Amazon, if anyone cares. At least you can screen cap the image and mock it on your website. That would be fun. As Schmalfeldt lays awake at night, waiting for the cold but welcome touch of the Reaper, he can at least take pride in the one contribution to humanity for which he can take credit in his otherwise meaningless, empty, angry, bitter existence, that being the recipe for a truly wonderful tuna casserole.

Personal Info

Books

Books

Log on to Amazon.com, search for "Schmalfeldt" and take your pick!

Comedy CDs!

Same as before! You can buy whole CDs, MP3 downloads or individual tracks on Amazon.

Stuff to Wear!

Log on to THE PARKY PLACE and check out all the neat crap we have that you don't need, but will help us fund PD Research.

Deep Brain Television

Either click "Play" and let 'er rip, or when a video is playing, mouse over the screen, hit the "<<" button, and scroll down to watch whatever looks good to you!

If This Service is of Value, Kick In Here and Your Gift Will Be Sent to the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research

Or, in the alternative, donate directly here. Of every dollar, 89 cents goes to research programs and ultimately better treatments for patients. The Foundation is a registered 501(c)(3) non-profit. Your contribution is tax deductible. Help the MICHAEL J FOX FOUNDATION FOR PARKINSON'S DISEASE RESEARCH and help people like me, and someday, perhaps, people like you!

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